
Alan Catlin has several new books in the works including a long series of noir movie poems concluding with three chapbooks in one book under the title Exterminating Angels from Kelsay for mid-year 2022. he also has two chapbooks coming soon as well: Satan’s Kiss from Gutter Snob ad Dream Rider from Orchard Street Press.
My first marriage was
A disaster, I know you’re probably thinking: how couldn’t it be? A nice Jewish girl from Hewlett marries the son of a WWII German solider? Her parents were like, “Sharon, how could you? You hate us so much you marry a Nazi.” He was no Nazi, he was conscripted. He was a reluctant soldier. Still, you knew you weren’t going to change their minds. And my mom was worse. My mom hates all men in general but she really hates me in particular. So, we moved up here to get away from the parents and give ourselves a chance. Not that it worked out. Not that I loved her, really. I only married her because she had big tits and I wanted to get laid a lot. Man, she was desperate to get out of town and she would do anything to get out. I mean absolutely anything. It was great. So doesn’t mom move up her to be closer to my sister and the grandkids. It’s the best of both worlds for mom: she gets to babysit and fill a whole new generation with hate and prejudice and she gets to torment me any time she wants. Well, you can imagine how that worked out. Badly. My marriage went kaput and Sharon moved out. No more getting laid regular. Last, I heard she was still living with her parents.
My second marriage
Was way better than the first. I married a woman from my church. You should come to our church. It’s a great place. We sing and hold hands and pray and everyone loves each other. Just what I needed when I was down. No, well, the only problem with my marriage was my wife’s teenaged daughter from a previous relationship. The girl resented me on sight. Hated me. You can tell these things. Somewhere along the line she accused me of molesting her. And I was arrested. It was humiliating. The whole experience has been a nightmare. Now my mother and my sister won’t answer my calls. I lost my job and I can’t find steady work and it isn’t over yet. But I still have my church. I go even more than I used to. Sometimes, I think people look at me differently than they used to. I don’t know. How can that be? I’m still the same person I was. It’s probably just my imagination.
Grand Reopening
Outside the convenience store Grand Reopening, the down on his luck man of indeterminate age, looked glum. “What’s not to like?” I said. “More gas pumps, piped in music while you fuel, better lights, fresh blacktop and an expanded selection of goods inside easily perused on wider, cleaner aisles.” “What about increased security?” “That too.” I said. “Yeah, but they chased away all the parking lot hookers. I miss that. They’re just not a full-service store anymore.”