Gordon Ferris was born in Dublin. In the early eighties, he moved to Donegal where he has lived ever since. He started writing in 2014 and has had many short stories and poems in many publications. He has also won prizes in the summer 2020 HITA Creative Writing Competition for his poem ‘Mother’, and won the winter competition for his poem ‘The Silence’. Poetry Ireland awarded Gordon a Poetry Town Bursary in 2021.
1 Night rush. From the rear of an ambulance, white lines rush by left and right Illuminated crucifixes flash by and show themselves she rises from her slumber looks at me and asks, are you ok? lowers her head, smiles closing her eyes again. 2. Morning. Curtains float on billowing air the sun rises to start this new day seagulls signalling there begging way. I watch you sleep and touch your hair you won't show fear you spare others being hurt you ask after the dog you disguise your pain You let your eyes follow the voice you must plan every step You accept the damage is done In the voice of a father in a hotel room alone after leaving his daughter in hospital for surgery during lockdown with all that entails. The Threshold Watching specks of dust Reaching for the light I see my precious one cannot even say good night. I recall her first waddling steps her race across the sun hardened garden I now witness her cross the threshold to the place where demons go Five times we guided her Five times we took her home This time there is a curse Which has her enter alone Without the forehead kiss And lie alone Can I send you something thinner than thoughts? taking away your pain and fear and replant them into me. Are you resting now your eyes closed dreams crossing the astral plane to be watched over by loved ones and dry their fallen tears? ( In the daughter’s voice after her ordeal.) Into darkness I take the last steps as carefully as the first steps each step thought about I rise with the desire as it's developed from rest and thought sometimes, desire abandons me I don't want to rise just to lay here listen to books as my eyes won't let me see the words the sounds on the street I don't know how near or far the cars are they sound right beside me are they going to hit me the depth of my footfall how high or low the path am I walking into a hole is this sound that of the flowing river underfoot on the bridge will I walk into its water? (Daughters voice again) sometimes our dreams come true / but not as we imagined we had huge plans a life together planned to move away to his country leave behind all I loved to be with him he had visited in summer after I had been ill he acted as if, all was normal he then returned home saying how he treasured the idea of our future together then nothing no word I messaged I phoned no reply no explanation as to why I inquired often fretted long, was he hurt unable to respond maybe laid up in bed Can he not be bothered to even answer the phone reply to my messages nothing only silence, ringing, messaging all received but no reply word did come that this was not so that he had moved on unfriended me just discarded me after much anger pain and self-blame I realise there’s no point in this torture count my blessings be glad my illness didn't happen in America.